NIB, IGY, OPP, HWC, WAP, TSOL, WASP, AARP, IBS, SIDS, STFU, LMK-of all of these initials, which are:
A.) band names
B.) popular songs
C.) popular songs with explicit words in the title
D.) texting abbreviations
E.) have to do with erratic bowels
F.) printed in big red letters on brochures that make you feel old?
That’s a lot of letters. That’s a lot of secret codes. IYKYK. All pretty obnoxious. Now take all of these initial clusters, and then multiply them by how many world languages there are, and that’s just TMI.
I am releasing a new song this week that I suppose would fall under the category of C): popular songs with explicit words in the title. The song is known as “BSG”, but my friends call it “Bat Shit Girl”. When I had to enter all the data to disseminate the song’s little green pollen onto all streaming platforms, yes, I did have to check the “explicit lyrics” box. Still. In this day and age. Shit is the least harmful of the seven dirty words. So to all of you parents out their trying to protect little ears, WTF!! I hate to say it, but bigger problems lie ahead.
I decided to abbreviate the title to keep everything tidy, but it does also add a bit of mystery as well. Oooooooooooh!!! I imagine it’s meaning will come up during late-night-party-denouement-deteriorating-into-music-trivia moments EVERYWHERE! “Do you know what “BSG” stands for? “Bacteriological Subterfugacious Gadzookeries?”
“BSG” is an old song and was inspired by a woman I used to associate with. I’d had no idea if I was in trouble with her or if she had something exciting to tell me, or both! She would glide into the room with wide eyes affixed to my feared visage. Her teeth would be bared. Was that a smile? What did I do wrong? Am I in trouble? What was I missing? I remember she wore a lot of silver jewelry. And oh yeah, she would play Jimmy Buffet in the office to rub in everyone’s face that she’d soon be heading somewhere warm and there were a lot of parrots.
Do you remember Nadine from “Twin Peaks”? Eye patch? Her husband, Ed was having an affair with Norma? I think the person to whom I am referring in BSG was a lot like Nadine. Except for in my situation, her bee in her bonnet had to do with a copy machine, and not curtain rods.
DIS-CLAMOR: I don’t want to come across as glib and dismissive and unsympathetic to a person like Nadine or the “BSG” I am referring to in my song. People hurt. Some have underlying rivers of troublesome lava, and it can seep out in humorous or not so humorous ways. Whether you have done something wrong or not yourself, certain interractions can be very destabilizing. Sometimes it’s a matter of stepping back with love and care and to try to understand the big picture. I also want to make it clear that I am aware of the Bechdel Test, which is an instrument used to “measure the representation of women in film and other fiction”* (or in this case, song). The Bechdel Test that has these criteria for film: it has to have at least two women in it who talk to each other about something besides a man. I believe I found somewhere, an extension of these criteria where a woman or women should not talk disparagingly about another woman. If that’s the case, then I guess “BSG” gets a D or an E. I feel a bit squirmy even referring to the Bechdel Test. Am I being defensive? Even giving this sidebar any airtime is kind of jumping on a bandwagon that to me, often does more harm than good. There is enough finger pointing and people accusing people of accusing people of accusing people these days. And if someoneis going to make great art, maybe there shouldn’t be so many constraints. Now all told, this woman I associated with WAS pretty Bat! Shit! Crazy! There! Snuck that in!
*-good old Wikipedia
Ok, got that all out of the way. Without Further Ado, I would like to serve this to all of you on a silver cafeteria tray! Enjoy“BSG”! Play it loud because it has sitars and carillon bells!
This is a bat shit crazy good track! No joke!
no disclaimers needed. i appreciate the Bechtel test in theory but it really doesn’t apply to the majority of art. It is a good reminder to consider how one is representing women/girls in our work, though. I will think for BSG as a dating acronym, like “Bubblebaths, saunas and groping.”